


From The Depths of My Chest

by wintershelter



Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV)
Genre: Familial Love, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Post-Season/Series 02, lisa snart is so important
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-04
Updated: 2017-06-04
Packaged: 2018-11-09 01:43:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,517
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11094279
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wintershelter/pseuds/wintershelter
Summary: While Mick is in Aruba, he gets a visitor.





	From The Depths of My Chest

After the Legends had dealt with the dinosaurs in Los Angeles, which sounded more like a badly named book than real life, Mick finally arrived in Aruba.

The team had stuck around and enjoyed the sun and surf for a while, but another time aberration had called them back to their original mission. Mick choose to stay behind. He didn’t have the heart to tell them he was done with time travel for good, just telling them, he needed some time to screw his head on straight. They gave him sympathetic nods and told him to take all the time he needed.

He was grateful when they left. He didn’t want to be around them. Hell, he didn’t want to be around anyone, period. It was one of the reasons why he hadn’t gone home.

He laughed at the thought of ‘home’.

He hadn’t had one since Len died.

He wasn’t so sure he had ever had a home, since he watched Len kill him.

When he had taken Len back to 2014, he had told him that stepping onto the Waverider would make him a better man.

But those words still didn’t stop the recurring nightmares Mick had when he went to sleep at it. It didn’t stop Mick from waking up in a cold sweat with the image Len murdering him painted on his retinas.

It hurt to know that the one person Mick had ever claimed to love could so callously kill him. No, not just kill him, but to do so with a laugh before stabbing him in the back.

Even at Mick’s lowest, in the depths of the Time Masters manipulations, he was never able to deal him the killing blow.

But Len had and Mick wasn’t sure how to reconcile that.

Mick distantly realized that by coming here he finally did what his hallucinations had been telling him from the start. To leave the team.

Mick would be lying if he said he didn’t dwell on that, because Len was all he had been thinking about.

He had two warring images of Len. The one who looked out for him and kissed him senseless after a successful heist, versus the one who had called him a dog and killed him for a virtual stranger.

Mick had never been to Aruba, but it wasn’t Aruba that mattered. All that mattered was it was hot and sunny and somewhere Len would have hated.

Mick spent the next two weeks, laying in the sun and drinking cheap beer.

It was during the third week, that a visitor came to see him.

Mick was laying on a beach chair when a shadow crossed over his face.

“Move.” Mick grunted, without opening his eyes.

A female voice tutted. “Now, is that any way to treat an old friend, Mickey?”

Mick’s eyes flew opened as he took in Lisa Snart.

She was standing in a black one piece swimsuit with a gold sarong sitting low on her hips. She looked stunning as usual but Mick was still caught up on the fact that Lisa Snart was standing next to him in Aruba of all places.

“Lisa? What are you doing here?” Mick asked.

“The Legends told the Flash that they’d dropped you off here a few weeks ago.” Lisa explained, flipping her hair over her shoulder.

“Okay, but why are you here?” Mick asked a little heatedly, sitting up in the chair so he could look at Lisa properly.

“You don’t get to be angry.” Lisa said, putting her hands on her hips. “You’ve been here three weeks and didn’t even think to call me?”

The last time he had seen Lisa, he had told her that Len had died. “I didn’t think you’d want to hear from me.” Mick answered honestly.

Lisa’s expression softened and she reached out to touch his shoulder. “Mick, like I told you before. I don’t blame you for his death.”

Mick thought back to dropping Len off at the warehouse in Keystone and wiping his memory, setting him on the path to his destruction.

Mick shrugged off her hand. “Well, maybe you should.”

“Mick.” Lisa warned in a low tone that reminded him so much of Len. “I will turn you into a gold statue if you ever say anything like that again. Lenny made his own choices, always did.”

The words were meant to be soothing but in the face of recent events, it just made Mick’s heart sink further.

Lisa grabbed his arm. “Come on, let’s get you out of the heat before you keel over.”

Mick followed as she led him back to the resort he was staying in. He shouldn’t have been surprised when she led him right back to his room. The Snarts had always had an uncanny way of finding where he was.

He opened the door and let her inside. Lisa sat down on one of the beds making herself at home. Mick had deliberately made sure he got a room with two beds. Even after everything, a king bed felt too big without Len in it.

“So…” Mick said, clearing his throat. “What are you doing here, for real?”

Lisa gave him a wounded look. “I don’t need an excuse to want to check in on my brother-in-law.”

“Don’t call me that.” Mick said.

Lisa’s eyes narrowed as she asked. “And why not?”

Mick just shook his head and Lisa noticed something in his expression because her sharp gaze softened. 

Lisa sighed. “Like I said earlier, I don’t blame you for his death and Len wouldn’t want you to blame yourself either.”

“It’s not that.” Mick said, because she was wrong. Len did blame him for his death, he said as much in 2014, but that wasn’t the reason why he didn’t want her to say that.

“Then what?” Lisa asked.

“It’s nothing.” Mick answered gruffly. “Just something I gotta work through.”

Lisa grabbed Mick’s hand in her own. “Mick, with Len gone, you’re all I have left in this world. Don’t push me away. Please.” Lisa said, her voice cracking on the last word.

Mick felt a knot get caught in his throat. “I don’t know where to start.”

Lisa moved a little closer to him. “Start anywhere.”

“That’s hard. It all blurred together after he-” Mick took in a breath as he tried to find his words. “I didn’t take it well.”

“What’d you do?”

“I went through the motions. I ate, drank, slept, did missions, but my heart wasn’t in it.”

“Why didn’t you leave then?”

Mick gave Lisa a look and she knew the answer before he even said it aloud. “Len. I didn’t want to go traveling through time, but he did. Nothing mattered to him more than the damn mission… I certainly didn’t it.”

“You mattered, Mick. When the Pilgrim kidnapped me, Len told me that he screwed up when he left you. He was afraid he wouldn’t be able to make it right.”

“Did he tell you what happened after he left me?”

Lisa’s face gave nothing away as she said, “About how you kidnapped him and threatened my life?”

Mick winced. “Yeah.”

Lisa reached out to touch his cheek. “It’s that expression right there why I know you would never be able to. Even at your angriest you have never been able to hurt me or Len.”

Mick huffed out a breath as he felt his eyes fill despite himself. “Yeah, well, he could hurt me.”

Lisa dropped her hand from his face. “He never meant to. He cared about you.”

“He didn’t care, Lise.” Mick argued, holding Lisa’s gaze. “He killed me.”

Lisa was quiet for a beat before she said, “What?”

Mick took a breath. “On top of fixing the timeline and what not, we had the Legion of Doom chasing us. I know, dumb name, I didn’t come up with it.” Mick said at Lisa’s raised eyebrow. “Anyway, they were a group of time travelers trying to get this magical Spear so they could re-write history. They… They recruited Len, from before he died. He, uh… killed a future version of me to save one of his new teammates.” Mick let out a bitter laugh. “Shouldn’t be surprised, he always discarded me when I had no use to him.

“That’s not true.” Lisa said, looking at Mick with disbelief.

Mick offered her a sad smile. “I watched it happen, Lise.”

“Lenny would never be able to do that to you.” Lisa said, firmly.

“I- I don’t wanna argue with you.” Mick said, trying to pull his hand out of hers. It only caused her to grip it tighter.

“I can’t remember a time you weren’t in Lenny’s life. He trusted you implicitly. He took your last name. Mick, he fucking died for you.”

“He died for the mission, for the team.” Mick corrected.

“If you think that, you are just as dumb as you pretend to be.” Lisa said, vehemently.

Mick’s shoulders slumped and his voice was small when he said, “He killed me, Lise.”

“He wouldn’t… He couldn’t.” Lisa stressed.

“Your words can’t change what happened.”

“Well, it’s true and if what you’re saying is true, then there is only one explanation: It wasn’t him.” Lisa said, fiercely. “It was a doppelganger or he was brainwashed or what the fuck ever because I know my brother and he would kill himself before ever hurting you. Fuck, he did.”

Mick thought back to his experience with brainwashing through the Time Masters. He’d been able to break through it, but when Rip was brainwashed by the Legion, he had killed Sara and had needed them to go inside his mind to break him out of it. Maybe they had gotten to Len and he was so messed he hadn’t noticed it between their few brief interactions.

“I don’t-” Mick rested his head in hands. “I don’t know.”

“Well, I know my brother and that wasn’t Len.” Lisa rested her hand on his back. “Look, I know Lenny wasn’t great with feelings but he loved you, you know. He really did and I don’t want you to doubt that for one second.”

Mick felt the truth of the statement hit him right in the chest.

Len had left him many times but he hadn’t been able to kill him. Every time Len had pointed a gun at him, he had either back down or missed. And yes, he knew if Len had walked in and saw Ray standing at the Oculus he wouldn’t have taken his place. He knew Len had done that for him and he felt guilty for not noticing or even thinking Len could be brainwashed. He had called Len out on not being able to kill him before.

Mick nodded. “You’re right. My head is just all messed up. I spent months hallucinations Len and to see him kill me… I just couldn’t understand it.”

Lisa’s hand stilled on Mick’s back. “You were hallucinating Len?”

Mick nodded.

“Mickey, please tell me you called your therapist or got some equivalent help.” Lisa asked.

“Yeah, I… talked to someone.”

“Someone?” Lisa asked saccharinely. “Was that someone qualified in mental health services?”

Mick’s silence was damning.

“Right.” Lisa muttered. “You are calling your therapist. When was the last time you saw her anyway? Before you hopped on the time ship probably.”

“Lisa, most of my issues deal with time travel. I mean, I’ve been working with Jean for years, but any mention of that and I think I’ll be on the first bus to Arkham.”

Lisa narrowed her eyes. “We live in a world were superpowered humans and aliens exist. Time travel is more than probable to anyone with a brain. And if talking to Jean doesn’t work, there’s some rumors about a doctor in Los Angeles who may be a bit more open to believing the unbelievable.”

Mick sighed at Lisa’s resoluteness but he knew she was right. “Fine.”

Lisa pressed a kiss to Mick’s temple and hugged him close. It had been such a long time since he’d experienced anyone being so affectionate with him. Amaya had been the closest thing to a friend he had had on the ship but he still hadn’t been completely comfortable when she had kissed him and hugged him, though maybe that had more to do with him not thinking he deserved it, more than anything else.

Mick took in a breath and let himself be held. The only noise was the constant whirl of the air conditioning unit.

After a minute, Mick shifted in Lisa’s grip to look at her. “I’m glad you’re here.”

Lisa gave him a smile. “Me too. Now how about we start packing shall we?”

Mick gave her a confused look. “What?”

Lisa pat his arms before unwrapping her arms from him and standing up. “You just agreed to come back to Central to see your therapist. Let’s pack.”

“But, you just got here.”

“And what, you thought I came to Aruba for the sights?” Lisa said, quirking an eyebrow. “I came here for you. I was worried and rightly so. Besides, I need you. Lenny tasked me with leading his Rogues when he was gone and since that is a more permanent position now, I could use a right-hand man to help me.”

“You don’t need me to do that.”

Lisa gave him an approving look. “You’re right. I have been doing just fine on my own, but I want you there. Your family Mick and I want you on my side.”

And, hell, Mick had never been good at saying no to either of the Snarts.

“Okay.” Mick relented.

Lisa’s eyes lit up. “Okay?”

“Yeah. I’ll help you manage your damn Rogues.”

Lisa smiled and clapped her hands together. “Great! Oh, you are gonna love them-” Lisa started before a noise in the corner drew her attention. “What is that?”

Mick looked and noticed she was pointing at Axel’s cage.

“That’s Axel. He’s my rat.”

Lisa looked at him then Axel and back again before bursting into loud peals of laughter.

“Oh my God! Axel is gonna flip out when he meets your rat.” Lisa said, wiping tears from her eyes. “This is gonna be so much fun, Mick.”

Mick gave her a smirk.

Lisa was already starting to babble about the rest of her Rogues, including the mysterious ‘Axel’ and what they’d been up to. The longer he listened, the more he felt he made the right choice. It had been a damn long while since he’d felt so at ease.

Maybe, this was a start to the healing. Time traveling hadn’t worked, being with the Legends hadn’t helped and this ‘vacation’ certainly hadn’t done anything except make things worse. But spending just a few hours with Lisa and Mick felt more calm than he had been in ages.  
Losing Len hurt, but he had been in the time stream so long he had forgotten that Len wasn’t the only Snart in his life.

And so, for the first time in months, he allowed himself to smile.

**Author's Note:**

> This was actually going to be an all hurt/no comfort fic but Lisa hijacked this fic and would not let me end it until Mick started feeling better. She can be persuasive, as you know.


End file.
